Danny DeVito

Janitor

Bruce Davis

The Devil

(archive footage)

Bob (voice)

Eddie

Self, Himself

Chesterfield (voice)

Jimmy Berkowitz

Self

Self

Chemist

Dr. Pembry

Self

Aldo

Eugene Portland

The Lorax (voice)

Al

Self

Cathkart

Merl

Gastner

Walter

District Attorney

Mel

Wayne the Pool Guy

Big D

Martin Weir

Frank Menure

Self

Booth

Frank Reynolds

Amos Calloway

Danny DeVito

Dr. Jack Carmichael

Dean Martin

The Penguin (archive footage)

Mickey Bergman

Dr. Horniker

Sid Hudgens

Alien on TV Monitor (uncredited)

Philoctetes (voice)

Rude Gambler

Swackhammer (voice)

Martin Weir

Roy

Whiskers (voice) (uncredited)

Oswald Cobblepot / The Penguin

Lawrence Garfield

Self - Laudatio, Self

Herbert Powell (voice)

Gavin D'Amato

Harry Valentini

Frank Stedman

Danny DeVito / Famous Mini Me ('Austinpussy')

Hog, Moon's Old Gang, Hog

Deck Shifflet

Martini

Self - Host / Willie Bouchet / Guava, Self - Host / Louie DePalma / Passenger / Bill Hoskins / Willie, Self - Co-Host / Various, Self - Host / Various / Ebenezer Scrooge / Gariton, Self - Host / Various / Mikhail Gorbachev, Self - Host, Self, Self - Cameo (uncredited)

John John the Apple / John DeAppoliso

Fred Mancuso

Danny DeVito